Marriage Quotes By Men...

A good mate of mine sent me these qoutes and they really made me laugh! I couldn't help but share them with you guys.

1.) I married Miss Right. I just didn't know her first name was Always.

2.) It's not true that married men live longer than single men. It only seems longer.

3.) A man was complaining to a friend: 'I had it all - money, a beautiful house, a big car, the love of a beautiful woman; then, Pow! it was all gone!' 'What happened?' asked the friend. "My wife found out.."

4.) Wife: Let's go out and have some fun tonight. Husband: Okay, but if you get home before I do, leave the hallway light on.

5.) How many men does it take to open a beer? None. It should be opened by the time she brings it to the couch.

6.) A man rushes into his house and yells to his wife, "Martha, pack up your things! I just won the lottery!" Martha replies, "Shall I pack for warm weather or cold?" The man responds, "I don't care. Just so long as you're out of the house by noon!"

7.) If your wife and a lawyer were drowning and you had to choose, would you go to lunch or to a movie?

8.) A man is incomplete until he is married. After that, he is finished.

Do you know any other funny quotes?

Little white envelopes please… or not!

Ok… so we’ve started designing the invitations. Who would’ve thought that so much thought would have to go into such a small project? Well, maybe the ladies reading this would understand the amount of time taken to produce those ‘perfect’ invitations, but I’m not to sure the guys would/do.

But that’s not the purpose of this note. We’ve (Megs says its only me though) hit a slight bump which we’re trying to maneuver our way either through or alternatively over. Let me explain…

For around 2-3 years I lived on my own, thereby accumulating pretty much everything one needs to live reasonably comfortably. Ok, so Megan doesn’t approve of all of my ‘manhood’ stuff so I suppose I would have to get rid of some of the stuff. Anyway, the point is, we have what we need to live: Crockery, Cutlery, Toothpaste, Dishwashing Liquid, Toilet Paper etc.

This is where our dilemma begins to take shape…

We don’t really need anything besides the big things which I’ve already blogged about – Stove, Fridge, Washing Machine etc. Feel free to donate those things should you feel lead to do so! Lol!!!
Most people would give toasters, kettles etc. and we really don’t need two of everything, so we’re thinking of asking people to consider giving a financial gift if they were in the first place, considering giving one.

Do you think this is a rude thing to do? If not, what do you consider we do to get our request through in the politest way possible?

From the void

This past week I received an email which I thought I'd share with you guys... For obvious reasons I've removed any personal information that she shared within the message.

Below is the email:

Hi there

Well the time has dawned that I have run out of my own pearls of wisdom and require some guidance from a respected source. So technically I am asking this of you, not as my friend, but on a professional basis so to speak.
(Alternatively a good kick up the arse would also be appreciated)

So the reality of the situation is as follows... over the last 6 mths I've tried to indulge in the boys that have been throwing themselves at me (LOL as they do of course). But nothing seems to be working.

The problem in a nutshell is that I just don't feel anything - there is no spark, no emotional attachment. The thing that I do feel is that there is a void and lack of emotion. Clearly guilt is not far behind as these guys really do like me and would like to have a meaningful interaction or relationship but I just don't 'feel' it. And trust me it isn't for lack of trying... I try and spend as much time in their company, even indulge in some fun activites and yes physical contact....but I just don't feel anything emotional.

So this is my dilemma - do I settle and hope that at some point in being with someone the emotion will come back, or do I continue to try everyone on, searching for someone who will actually somehow get an emotional reaction out of me?

Please don't give me the age old time will heal all pains speech or the everything happens for a reason blah blah because frankly it provides no sense of comfort or reassurance. (And yes I have stopped the daily crying over ***** and really feel that I have moved on, all's forgiven and I have accepted my fate but for some reason that hasn't lifted this feeling of being a void!)

I'm sorry to be requesting this from you but hey at least its not asking you to come up with world peace! Perhaps your blog crowd would be able to come up with some interesting opninions/suggestions. "When you have loved & lost the One, do you settle for someone who thinks you are the One or do you keep searching till you find another One" ???

From the void
*****

If you have any questions answered by her, I will mail her and post her response, unless she requests that I don't post it.

I have my own ideas and opinions as to what I think she could consider doing but she also wants to know what you guys think... so, what do you think?

Humorous 2009 Election Adverts

Court approves marriage of girl, 8

Court approves marriage of girl, 8
April 20, 2009 Edition 2

RIYADH: Saudi Arabia was looking into introducing a minimum age for marriage, a justice ministry official was quoted as saying, after a court upheld the marriage of an eight-year-old girl to a man 50 years her senior.

Al-Madina newspaper yesterday quoted Mohamed al-Babtain, the director of marriage officials at the justice ministry, as saying the ministry had started "looking into the legal age of marriage". He did not elaborate.

Saudi Arabia has no legal age limit for marriage. Justice ministry officials were not available for comment.

The newspaper also quoted prominent cleric Sheikh Mohsen al-Obaikan as saying that girls below the age of 18 should not be allowed to marry.
Obaikan called for a ban on "marrying off little girls below the age of 18 to avoid these blights".

A court in the town of Unaiza upheld for the second time last week the marriage of the girl to a man who is about 50 years her senior, on condition he does not have sex with her until she reaches puberty. - Reuters


Have you heard of any similar stories? What should we do to prevent this kind of thing from happening in our country?

Article taken from here.

Zuma willing to reconsider abortion laws

Haven’t quite yet made up your mind who you should vote for yet? Perhaps this can assist you...

Zuma willing to reconsider abortion laws
April 17, 2009 Edition 1

PRETORIA: Christians have been invited to raise objections to abortion laws and same-sex marriages with a Jacob Zuma presidency.
"JZ was not president when these things were happening ... there are no holy cows," ANC national executive member Mathole Motshekga told a debate at the University of Pretoria yesterday. "Anything one had problems with could be raised," he told the meeting, which was considering why Christians should vote for a particular political party.

The debate, which was attended by the ANC, the DA, Cope and the African Christian Democratic Party, also heard criticism of Zuma for a claim that God was on the ANC's side.

The DA's Willem Doman said the claim indicated a "move in the direction of a dictatorship". - Sapa

Have you hear any other ridiculous comments and statements by various political parties through their campaigning? (Story taken from here)

Boys and their toys...

We went car shopping yesterday… I’ve never before felt so intimidated! The sales persons were all over me like I was a fresh piece of meat for them to devour!!! I think, no I know, that they knew it was my first time at buying a car through a dealer.

Yesterday we looked at the Hyundai Getz and the i10 as well as the Ford Fiesta. All 3 are appealing to us and fit the budget fairly well. Do you guys have any experience with these cars or know stories about them?

Like I said, I’ve never bought a car from a dealer before so I’m not really sure what sorts of things to be on the lookout for as well as what sort of things I should ask. What do you suggest?

We’re also a bit confused and I’m hoping you guys could assist me in answering this question: Financially speaking, is it cheaper to buy a new car than a second hand car?

Got any suggestions you can share with Megs and I?

Divorce will be a clean break for her

The more Megs and I discuss marriage and the rest of our lives, the more we learn about each other. We've especially learned a lot about each others habits, what we like don't like etc. I don't think we'll ever reach a point like the woman in this article where we will end our marriage! In fact, we don't plan on ever ending our marriage!!!

BERLIN: A German woman has divorced her husband because she was fed up with him cleaning all the time.

German media reported that the wife got through 15 years of marriage putting up with the man's penchant for doing household chores, tidying up and rearranging the furniture.

But she ran out of patience when he knocked down and rebuilt a wall at their home when it got dirty, Christian Kropp, court judge in the central town of Sondershausen, said yesterday.

"I'd never had anyone seek a divorce for this," he said. - Reuters

Article taken from here.

No U2 on the horizon as fans rattled by hoax

I'm glad I wasn't anywhere near this town cause I would've fallen for this April fools hoax as well!!!

No U2 on the horizon as fans rattled by hoax
Ralph Riegel

Hundreds of U2 fans were duped yesterday in an elaborate April Fool's Day prank when they rushed to a shopping centre believing the band was playing a surprise rooftop concert.

The prank -- organised by Cork radio station RedFM -- fooled listeners, with early morning details of the impromptu concert and live news bulletins during which U2 were clearly heard playing in the background.

The station also carried audio clips of "U2" playing a rooftop concert at Blackpool Shopping Centre. But, in reality, it was the tribute band U2opia.

Gesture

The station claimed the real band wanted to make a gesture to Cork, as they are not playing a gig there this summer, and that they had decided to recreate their famous concert from the rooftop of a Los Angeles liquor store in the late 1980s.

That concert has gone down in rock 'n' roll legend, but this one will only go down in Red FM legend.

On first hearing of the U2 gig yesterday, fans rushed to the shopping centre from all over Cork city and county, with reports of some people running out of work to catch the impromptu gig and others abandoning their shopping to get to Blackpool.

By mid-morning, almost 500 people had gathered around the shopping centre to try and catch a glimpse of their rock heroes. The gardai and Cork fire brigade, who had been alerted in advance to the hoax, played along, and it was later broadcast that the concert was being shut down on health and safety grounds.

But hundreds of fans continued to mill around outside the shopping centre as a large crane hoist was used to bring security personnel to the roof, lending credence to the suggestion that Bono, The Edge, Larry and Adam were being told to pull the plug and get off the roof.

Fans admitted they were totally taken in by the prank, and one woman said she had driven 30 miles just to try to get to see U2.

Red FM and Blackpool Shopping Centre said they were taken aback by the reaction, but added that those duped had taken it in good humour.

© Irish Independent, 2009. (Original Post here)

Were you fooled this year?